He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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