She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
