She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
