is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
