Nicole vs. Life
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
