I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
