your room smells of hookers.
And success
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
