I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize