Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.

  (1-619): View more from California

  i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning. (1-619): i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth! http://tfl.nu/6amj
  Replies (9) Good night (1787) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much http://tfl.nu/7w3a
  Replies (3) Good night (599) Bad night (1382)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there http://tfl.nu/icqv
  Replies (36) Good night (928) Bad night (9762)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well http://tfl.nu/14t6
  Replies (7) Good night (4596) Bad night (1393)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone http://tfl.nu/koze
  Replies (36) Good night (2741) Bad night (5412)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag. http://tfl.nu/1x8m
  Replies (19) Good night (1527) Bad night (5397)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that. http://tfl.nu/auq5
  Replies (15) Good night (972) Bad night (5764)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God http://tfl.nu/m4vw
  Replies (3) Good night (2371) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas http://tfl.nu/6rrb
  Replies (9) Good night (2319) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+31): I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates. http://tfl.nu/urqj
  Replies (3) Good night (2476) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love. http://tfl.nu/12sb
  Replies (8) Good night (3727) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory... (1-215): just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!" http://tfl.nu/238t
  Replies (10) Good night (2494) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score http://tfl.nu/rd1e
  Replies (7) Good night (1510) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas. http://tfl.nu/72c6
  Replies (3) Good night (972) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (409): No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups. http://tfl.nu/fjk8
  Replies (2) Good night (233) Bad night (612)

Randomize