how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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