Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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