hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize