His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
