dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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