the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
