So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
birth control should be required to get into college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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