Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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