called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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