I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
