that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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