You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
