Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
