Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize