How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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