There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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