We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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