We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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