chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
