Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
