He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
