is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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