I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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