He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I have tasted many bathrooms
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
