just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.