Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
