Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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