hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
