Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
