Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
