break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
