The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
