she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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