I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
We had to coat check the pizza.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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