There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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