Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Green mimosas i think yes
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?