Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?

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  (519): i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends? http://tfl.nu/08w4
  Replies (101) Good night (34860) Bad night (4118)
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  (212): View more from New York

  at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver

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  (212): at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver http://tfl.nu/1ssj
  Replies (10) Good night (2299) Bad night (1319)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.

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  (360): There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line. http://tfl.nu/jhch
  Replies (12) Good night (913) Bad night (2463)
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  (916): View more from California

  Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.

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  (916): Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you. http://tfl.nu/jbv6
  Replies (11) Good night (3136) Bad night (1055)
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  (626): View more from California

  Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.

  (1-626): View more from California

  This is why you don't have nice things.

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  (626): Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread. (1-626): This is why you don't have nice things. http://tfl.nu/swqp
  Replies (3) Good night (1528) Bad night (829)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.

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  (631): Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving. http://tfl.nu/bkg4
  Replies (4) Good night (945) Bad night (709)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.

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  (908): I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game. http://tfl.nu/k79m
  Replies (3) Good night (608) Bad night (443)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.

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  (201): There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now. http://tfl.nu/vb5o
  Replies (1) Good night (630) Bad night (378)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.

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  (305): We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened. http://tfl.nu/a50c
  Replies (3) Good night (807) Bad night (415)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead

  (1-417): View more from Missouri

  Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.

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  (417): Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead (1-417): Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp. http://tfl.nu/xy3p
  Replies (7) Good night (777) Bad night (361)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint

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  (503): U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint http://tfl.nu/psor
  Replies (0) Good night (1093) Bad night (476)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.

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  (513): I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me. http://tfl.nu/ewcq
  Replies (2) Good night (385) Bad night (701)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.

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  (207): I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee. http://tfl.nu/94ss
  Replies (1) Good night (350) Bad night (594)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.

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  (712): My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty. http://tfl.nu/9p9j
  Replies (1) Good night (572) Bad night (246)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.

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  (541): Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low. http://tfl.nu/8hxe
  Replies (0) Good night (115) Bad night (120)

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