He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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