To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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