I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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