I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
