i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
