The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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