no, he came in my armpit
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize