the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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